Mental health please answer?

im 19 and for about 5 years ive had mental health. i used to have a truly brilliant mind, i could paint, sing, dance, and was one of the best. i was going to be the succeeder of the family. the youngest of three brothers. but mental health seems to have destroyed and overtaken my mind. i now take risperedone and mirtazapine. i can only just about watch telly, the rest of the time i cant function even with tablets. to me functioning isnt just having a consience, functioning is having a life, a mind, friends, a career, a job. i cant have any of this as my mind has stopped working. my mu says my mind is still there under the illness, but i am not convinced. ive lost so much in my life. im 19 and cant move on. is there any other medicine that may help me. phycotherapy wont work. all my outings in life are seeing docters, going for walks. i want more than that. i want what every normal person has. please help me. i used to suffer from mild scitzaphrenia, phcycosis, and depersonalisation. this seem to have cleared but now i am left with nothing, no brain. i try brain training but nothing matched up to the great mind i used to have. i used to have pion for art, music, celebrities, fashion, films, but its all gone. my mind cant have vanished? surely its just a chemical imbalance that can be rid of with the right medication.....surley, i desperatly want to shine and be the great achiever i once was, go to art school, but time is moving on, and my mind hasnnt shifted. please help. i dont even get one single thought any more. i cant go on, i went out and bought four boxes of paracetamol the other day......please help me